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Don't Let Your Money Ruin Your Marriage

By Miriam Caldwell, About.com

Getting married is a big commitment. It involves a lot of trust and work. It is wonderful to find someone that you want to spend your life with. As you prepare to get married, it is important to sit down and discuss finances. One of the leading causes of contention and divorce in marriage is finances. It is important that you take the steps before you get married to make sure that you and your future spouse will work together.

1. Communicate About Your Finances

You need to make sure that you will work together on your finances. This means that you should sit down and openly discuss where you are currently including all of your debt and assets. Once you are married you combine these. It can be very frustrating to have one person spend money frivolously while the other one saves money constantly. You need to work together to find a happy medium.

2. Set Goals Together

After you discuss where you each are financially you should set specific finance related goals as a couple. This can include getting out of debt, buying a home and saving for retirement. You should be specific with a timeline and amounts, because this will help you stay on track. Your goals will help you to succeed financially and retire comfortably. As you work together to achieve these goals you will find that the direction and purpose helps to strengthen your marriage.

3. Budget As a Couple

Additionally you should plan a budget together. This will help you to work together to achieve your goals. It also sets up clear spending guidelines. When you are budgeting as a couple, it is essential that you communicate on a regular basis. At first you may need to go over the budget every night and report your spending to each other. Once you have been budgeting for a few months, you may be able to talk about your finances just twice a week. By discussing what you have spent and keeping a running total of your budget, you will both be involved the daily financial decisions and work together as a team.

4. Paying for Your Wedding

The wedding and honeymoon can quickly become very expensive. It is important that you set up a budget and find ways to pay cash for your wedding. This can prevent you from starting out your marriage with a lot of debt. It will also help you to look back at your wedding with happy memories instead of resentment when it comes time to pay off the bills.

5. Merging Your Finances

Finally when it comes to marriage and money, you should let go of the past and move forward together. If you are going to resent the student loan or credit card debt your spouse brings into the marriage, you may need to rethink getting married. When you are married you take on both the positive and negative aspects of the marriage. It is important to consider the debt and savings as ours instead of yours or mine. This will lead to a much more positive experience for both of you. You may want to talk to a marriage counselor or a church leader about these issues before you get married.

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